I saw a lot of triceps. I saw a lot of sunburns. I saw spectators dressed as if they were headed to do a workout, not watch one. I saw a lot of Reebok nanos. I saw countless ripped hands, bruised collarbones, and scabbed shins. I saw a baby wearing a shirt that said “beast mode”. I saw an unexpected number of long blonde pony tails.
I saw food trucks selling grass-fed beef hamburgers. I saw food trucks with menus sorted by paleo and paleo-ish. I saw probably a hundred thousand sweet potato fries. I saw line ups 45+ minutes for a hamburger, while the woman running the churro stand wondered why she hadn’t had a customer in hours. I saw even longer line ups to get into the official merch tent.
I saw a tired crowd get to its feet, heat after heat, to cheer on the any straggling finishers. I saw that one drink vendor in the tennis stadium who kept saying Vitamin C Water (instead of Vitamin Water) like 12 times over the course of the weekend.” Water, water, Vitamin C water!” I saw this old man, who identified as the grandpa of one of the athletes, watch what must have been his first competition. While watching the team legless, he was like, “oh holy smokes, now the girls are going to do it!!!”, totally impressed. I saw a lot of people with tattoos.
I saw a teenage girl kind of freak out after meeting her idol, Annie Thorisdottir. I saw Annie Sakamoto sitting a few rows behind me at one point and she is really beautiful. I saw Max Greenfield just walking around and got all flustered while telling him that I hope he and Veronica Mars end up together, but he politely took a photo with me anyway. You guys, I saw Pukie.
I saw a whole tonne of trapezii. I saw lots of neon colours and bare torsos. On the non-bare torsos, I saw many, many Crossfit-themed shirts. Crossfit shirts are totally a thing. People love them! I mean, people really, really love wearing Crossfit shirts.
In the vendor’s village, I saw a lot of merchandise catered to women. It’s nice to be a considered a worthwhile market share! There were some booths that went with the “if you make it pink, that means its the women’s version” approach, others that printed the exact same things on men’s and women’s shirts, and others than haven’t gotten over snatch jokes yet.
I understand that we all need to get our bangs out of our eyes, yet still felt overwhelmed by the extensive headband selection.
And of course, the classic Crossfit-themed thong booth (which had no line, I would like you to know).And for the girl in your life who likes to look like somebody slapped both her butt cheeks but doesn’t want to have to do the dirty work, there’s always these shorts:
But let me tell you, the real story here is the shirts.
The most common were shirts declaring toughness in the wearer or enforcing toughness in the reader of the shirt. There was one that said, “If I pass out, please note my time” but I didn’t get a photo of it.
Okay, so far, so good. What else? Well there were plenty that went heavy on the girly girl
There were MANY shirts declaring strength to be beautiful. I only took one picture but I swear there were dozens!
There were also the ones that you would really only understand if you do Crossfit:
And there were the ones that made fun of ellipticals:
There were the “I heart…” shirts
And there were ones that are like, wait why do you want a shirt that says that?
I’ll call this category “shirts for men about women”
And the official Games shirts. I’ve written about them before, but it’s still really cool to me to see as many women’s jerseys being sold (and bought) as there were men’s jerseys:
I was really excited to spend some dough on some sweet Crossfit threads while all the Games, but came back empty handed. I liked the athletes’ jerseys, but I don’t like shirts with years on them. I liked some of the LifeAsRx shirts, but they involve their logo too much in the design. Otherwise, nothing was really up my alley. I have plenty of Crossfit shirts. I’m a person who likes Crossfit shirts! But so many of these were just trying too hard, or something.
Oh well, at least I met Officer Leo!